If it weren’t for them…
This past weekend, I attended the funeral visitation of George Depsky. Who is George Depsky? Well, George was a lot of things, among them Maureen’s husband and of all the things George did in his life, this was his most important and significant “title”.
In my first job out of college as an engineer with Kimberly-Clark, I worked in a manufacturing plant with George and Maureen. I didn’t have a ton of daily work contact with George, given our respective assignments. But we saw each other regularly in the break room or around the office. George was an imposing figure and was universally respected. He could be gruff but deep down was a real softie. He took great pleasure in harassing me (tongue usually in cheek). His favorite target: my haircut. Trust me, I never shot back about his! And as intimidating as George could sometimes seem, I knew I who was the boss (Maureen) and I knew she had me covered.
Maureen was and is an angel. I’ve told many stories about Maureen over the years in professional context. She was among a few of the “lab ladies” that worked in the QA Lab that I say literally “raised me” in corporate life. At 23, I was among a select few young engineers that she and others took under their wing, not necessarily as their project but rather more in the form of simple leadership, role modeling, and setting high expectations of us. By 25, I was Maureen’s boss, at least on paper, but she was still leading me. I could tell stories for days but few people in my life have had as profound impact on me professionally as Maureen Depsky. So when she texted me at 3:55 a.m. one morning that the love of her life had died unexpectedly, I cried with her.
Rewind about 8 years ago, I had the unbelievably unique opportunity to spend a day with John Pepper, retired CEO of Procter & Gamble. A team of us went up to Cincinnati with Don Soderquist to interview Mr. Pepper on his experiences in leadership One of the highlights was having a sandwich at the legendary Red Fox Grill downtown, one of Mr. Pepper’s favorites. After lunch and as the day was winding down, Mr. Pepper reflected on all the people that made a difference in his life and career. As we wrapped up, he shared a copy of a paper he’d written titled, “If It Weren’t For Them”. It was a letter to current P&Gers to acknowledge specific people, by name, and the specific things they did that influenced his career. It was also to inspire them to both recognize who would be on their own list but also to carry this on – to make a difference for someone else.
As a former K-Cer who had competed fiercely with P&G during Pepper’s tenure as CEO, I got a front row seat to why P&G had been such a great company and worthy rival. It was a day I will always remember.
Back to this week…. I have mourned the loss of a friend and broke social distancing to hug the neck of a grieving widow. I spent 7 hours in the car for 15 minutes of face time. (Don’t worry, we’ve already planned for more when things settle down for her.) But that’s not because I’m such as nice guy. It’s because George and Maureen are on my “If It Weren’t For Them” list.
For those of you that know me, it’s perhaps a little nugget of something you didn’t know, about a couple that I last worked with in 1999 that would explain a lot of what you see in me.
For all of us, we would do well to take Mr. Pepper’s challenge and example. Who makes your list? Have you told them and thanked them for the difference they made? And finally, as we all try to pay it forward, whose list might you be making?